How Being Caught in the Sandwich Generation Made Me a Better Realtor, Mother, and Person
When my mom was diagnosed with early-onset dementia, it threw my world completely off balance. My kids were just 4 and 6 when we first started noticing the changes in my mom. Her memory would slip in small ways at first — little things that were easy to explain away — but deep down, we knew something wasn’t right.
At the time, I had just wrapped up a banner year in real estate. Life felt full, but manageable. My parents weren’t very involved in my daily life, which, looking back, allowed me to focus almost entirely on raising my young family without a second thought.
Everything changed quickly. My dad, true to his strong Italian roots, had very clear ideas about how my sisters and I should show up for the family. Suddenly, the unspoken expectation was that we would somehow figure out how to balance our own busy lives — work, young kids, everything — and step in to help.
I was already stretched thin, and the pressure from all sides was overwhelming. No matter what I did, it felt like I was letting someone down.
At first, I thought the answer was simple: I would step back from real estate and throw myself fully into helping with my mom’s care. But it didn’t unfold the way I expected. My dad didn’t want that kind of help — at least, not from me. He struggled with the idea of sharing decisions, and the more I tried to take things off his plate, the more tension it created.
This wasn’t an easy realization. It was through my work with an incredible mindset coach, Catherine Farquharson, that I started to see it clearly. I thought I was easing the burden, but in reality, I was making it harder for him. What he truly needed was to stay in control. And what I needed was to let go — and shift my energy back into my own life.
Somewhere in the chaos of raising little kids and caring for aging parents, it’s so easy to lose yourself. I had forgotten how to prioritize my own needs.
With time, effort, the support of my amazing husband, Elliott and a lot of inner work, I started building a new framework for my life. I learned how to honour boundaries — both theirs and mine. I set a schedule that felt sustainable: one day a week dedicated to my parents, a weekly tennis clinic just for me (pure joy!), and plenty of space for my family and my work to thrive again.
And everything changed.
I began to actually look forward to my visits with my parents. I wasn’t running on empty anymore. For the first time in what felt like forever, I could show up for everyone — including myself — without resentment, exhaustion, or guilt.
Working with Catherine Farquharson was truly transformational, and I can’t recommend her enough. If you’re feeling stuck, stretched too thin, or lost somewhere in the middle, she’s someone who can help you find your way back.
You can check her out here: CF Coaching Program.